Week #1: Tania Winston

I am a safety conscious person, I just never realized it at first. My doors are always locked at night before bed, and I still occasionally check up on my sleeping children, ages 8 and 4. When I sleep, my side of the bed is closest to the bedroom door, and for some reason, I cannot fall asleep with my back facing it. My husband has an extremely dangerous job as an Army Infantryman. He has been doing this job for 17 years. He knows how to fight and kill “bad guys’ and how to protect those around him. However, because he feels safe at home, and no longer at a battle-ready status, he sleeps heavily. I feel as if it is my job to be the one to wake up if someone breaks in, and then subsequently wake him up. These things are not something I was aware I was doing, at least not until I started watching the Investigation Discovery Channel a few years ago. I don’t know why this channel caused me to look at the things I was doing, but it did. Maybe it was the fact that all the people portrayed never realized they were in trouble until it was too late.
So, fast forward to present time, now fully conscious of my certain behavioral quirks, I watch the show “Surviving Evil,’ on this same channel. The show is hosted by Charisma Carpenter, and depicts stories of people who have fought and survived awful crimes committed against them, their families, and those around them. Miss Carpenter is an actress known for her roles in Buffy and Angel, but most importantly, she also survived an attempt on her life by a serial killer when she was younger. This particular episode has two stories. The first story is about a woman kidnapped by her formerly abusive ex-husband. She was trapped in a storage unit for 3 days and suffered toe loss from frostbite after being confined in a trashcan. The second story is the one that really resonated with me. It was about a man who walked into a school with a machete, his plan was to find and hurt the children of a woman who had wronged him. The principal bravely fought off the attacker and saved the kids. Throughout this story, all I could think about was if the school I send my kids to had such a valiant protective staff.
Afterward, I begin to reconsider all the things I do at home, and look over all my recently discovered habits. The one thing I do is lock my doors during the day. I also ask myself a few questions. Should I be doing more to protect my family? Can I depend on others to keep them as safe as I would? Is my protective behavior excessive, or am I worrying over things that won’t happen?
Regardless of my feelings on what “Surviving Evil’ has brought to the surface, the one thing this TV show has demonstrated to me is I don’t know what is in store for me, good or bad. Nobody does. The question now is, am I ready for it?